It is a common desire for most people as they embark on this journey of life to attempt to do so with some sense of purpose and meaning. The idea of aimlessly wandering through days, months and even years of existence without ever really weaving the sum of our experiences into the fabric of who we are leaves us feeling somewhat unfulfilled.

We spend the majority of our time and focus on collecting the dots of life, unfortunately we run out of time and energy to be able to actually connect them. It is the connecting part that puts the smile on our face, the spring in our step and the very real sense of wellbeing down in our soul.

After all, we know the real good stuff about life, the stuff that invigorates and energizes us has much less to do with places and things and much more to do with people and purpose. Intangible qualities like caring and commitment oddly enough lead us toward a sense of meaning in life we so earnestly want.

If purpose is ultimately realized through caring about something or someone, then the question becomes how do we learn to care? After all, if I feel passionately about a person or a cause then the logical progression would be to make a commitment to what I am feeling. It is this “cart before the horse” mentality where emotion clouds logic and betrays genuine commitment.

Real passion, that is to say caring with an emotional component, follows our commitment to simply act. It is when we are moved to act that enduring, meaningful feelings kick in like an afterburner to sustain our initial decision.

Love is an action word. Caring comes in waves as we are doing. Strong feelings always follow our decisions to participate in those things that matter to us the most. A life lived on purpose is achieved through conscientious and intentional decisions to commit ourselves first and care as a result.

On the other hand, fading feelings often reflect wavering commitment. It is predictable to say the least that our feelings about something or someone would begin to subside as our choices to actively care diminish. Stop doing the things that created the passion and the passion becomes anemic. Here are some suggestions to stay committed in our lives to what matters most.

1. LEARN TO BE COMFORTABLE WITH COMMITMENT IN YOUR LIFE.
People who avoid commitment are depriving themselves of the huge emotional benefits of learning to truly care. Emotions are life’s vivid enhancement of making little things memorable and bigger moments unforgettable. Don’t shortchange yourself. Be it commitment in a relationship, to a profession, a hobby or just a mindset in general, embrace the opportunities to care without reservation.

2. BE CAREFUL WHERE YOU INVEST YOURSELF, YOUR EMOTIONS WILL FOLLOW
Like a caboose at the rear of the train, so your emotions will tag along right behind your decisions in life, be they healthy or not. More than one relationship has hit the rocks because the thoughtful behaviors that used to be shown to a spouse were now being directed to someone else. You’ve heard it before in a conversation leading up to a divorce, “I just don’t feel the same way I used to”. No kidding.

3. COMMITMENT ENDURES EVEN WHEN EMOTION CHANGES
What separates the truly extraordinary athletes from the ordinary, the entrepreneurs who are the movers and shakers compared to those who had big ideas with little outcomes? Why do some marriages last 50 years and some don’t last 50 days? How does one person discover a revolutionary medical breakthrough where others tried and failed? Long after the emotional buzz of a decision wears off, real commitment will always stand the test of time. Commitment can stand alone if need be, good vibration sidekick or not.

4. A LIFE OF PURPOSE IS DISCOVERED ALONG THE ROAD OF COMMITMENT
Not one commitment, but many. It is the collective sum of all of our commitments along life’s journey with the accompanying emotions that give life a rich texture and depth. It rounds off our rough edges and makes us who we are one experience at a time.


Dennis McCaslin is a freelance writer from Texas making random observations on everything from politics to psychology…and all that is humorous in between.